Identity Issues

In a world fast changing, there’s this seeming pressure to prove oneself, to make a statement of attaining to certain standards that one thinks are vital to his existence. I have no issues with standards, as a matter of fact, I like standards. They are reference points that stir us towards becoming better versions of ourselves and give us goals to pursue in life. I am however a strong believer in living life according to purpose. By that I mean, the standard I pursue should be in line with my purpose in life. 

Going to college in an entirely new environment (Gombe, Nigeria) gave me access to interact with and observe a lot of people and that opened me up to their thought processes and the realization that many are not secure in who they are. This does not in any way mean that others in other places do; I have come to learn that it’s a global issue. 

There is a strong desire to fit in even when one is not meant to and it has led many astray, crushed destinies and destroyed lives yet people don’t back down on the quest. It is unthinkable what some do to fit in. From a lady who gets into a relationship just because her friends are all in one and is scared of being called a loner to a guy who starts taking psychoactive substances because his friends mocked him saying he’s a coward.

Furthermore, a married man who gets a loan to spend on luxuries he truly can’t afford, so his friends would think he is doing well, this is synonymous with the popular adage that says, “Robbing Peter to Pay Paul”. What more should I say of the wife who throws parties or buys jewelleries to prove a point to the woman next door creating a pseudo euphoria. The list is endless, and you know the question that usually pops at those times, what would people say? 

I believe it’s time to rise above this norm. I believe that two major factors that create a divide between developed countries and others are self discovery and timely action. If nations and individuals would go on that quest and build on their uniqueness, there would be a change, but it seems there is great fear and unwillingness to take those significant steps. 

No one ever became something in life by moving with the crowd or a general idea. Rather, such a person is groomed by a selected few who have an understanding of where he is coming from, where he is, and where he is going to. 

Your template is different and as long as you do not recognize that, you will never have a tangible answer to the question above because every time you are asked, you shall define yourself with reference to the original and I tell you that original should only be God. There are inexhaustible dimensions in him that He designed you to be a masterpiece not a copy. 

What you perceive as your weaknesses may actually be the tools for your building. Every man has a story; you don’t have to allow the pressure to prove a point get to you. Life is in seasons; your time will come until then relax and enjoy the process no matter how difficult. 

For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry. (Habakkuk 2:3 KJV) 

Be confident and content in who you are. Endure the process.